Friday, 25 June 2010
Happy.
Recently, I've been thinking of the last time I was really, truely happy. And I can't remember.
Before anyone says, "you're 18 live life". I'm fed up of hearing this. Yes, I'm 18 and yes I have my whole life to live, thanks for reminding me. I've been thinking about my future. What the hell is going to happen?
I don't think I'm fit to be a dad, let alone a good husband. I'll have a shit job, shit income and a shit house. I'll have a 1993 Ford Fiesta. It will be red. I'll definetely be addicted to something, drugs or drink. Hell it could even be birds. Think about it. Really, think. You see old people doing stuff which seems really boring, bird watching or train spotting for instance. Am I going to spend my later life with a pair of binoculars, a piece of paper and a keen eye for a pigeon. I don't want this to happen.
Life happens in 3 different ways.
1.)You fall in love, you get married, you start a family, you grow old and you die.
or
2.) You fall in love, you get married, you start a family, you argue, you divorce, your kids grow up hating you, you grow old and die alone.
or
3.) You get run over and die.
That's it. What else is there to life? You work a shit job you hate, you lead a shit life you pretend to love? I can't handle that. So this has got me thinking. I want to grab life by the balls. There's a person that means way too much to me than they should. After everything that's happened, I'd still stand in thier corner. Is this love? or is this just what happens to everyone? At the moment I think number 3 is more likely to happen to me than number 1. Real deep.
The bird finally buggered off. I'm kinda sad, no matter how loud it was, it was always awesome to know theres a bird outside my window. Kinda like something watching over me. But then reality hits again and it's a bird. Does anyone actually do that? Talk to themselves? I'll be the first to admit I do. Most the time unintentionally. But it's always better having that one person who would listen to you. I used to have that. I think?
I don't know where lifes going to lead me, but I'm skeptical. I just hope some luck finally hits my way soon. I feel a right pillock telling you this blogspot!
I'm tired, night.
x
Before anyone says, "you're 18 live life". I'm fed up of hearing this. Yes, I'm 18 and yes I have my whole life to live, thanks for reminding me. I've been thinking about my future. What the hell is going to happen?
I don't think I'm fit to be a dad, let alone a good husband. I'll have a shit job, shit income and a shit house. I'll have a 1993 Ford Fiesta. It will be red. I'll definetely be addicted to something, drugs or drink. Hell it could even be birds. Think about it. Really, think. You see old people doing stuff which seems really boring, bird watching or train spotting for instance. Am I going to spend my later life with a pair of binoculars, a piece of paper and a keen eye for a pigeon. I don't want this to happen.
Life happens in 3 different ways.
1.)You fall in love, you get married, you start a family, you grow old and you die.
or
2.) You fall in love, you get married, you start a family, you argue, you divorce, your kids grow up hating you, you grow old and die alone.
or
3.) You get run over and die.
That's it. What else is there to life? You work a shit job you hate, you lead a shit life you pretend to love? I can't handle that. So this has got me thinking. I want to grab life by the balls. There's a person that means way too much to me than they should. After everything that's happened, I'd still stand in thier corner. Is this love? or is this just what happens to everyone? At the moment I think number 3 is more likely to happen to me than number 1. Real deep.
The bird finally buggered off. I'm kinda sad, no matter how loud it was, it was always awesome to know theres a bird outside my window. Kinda like something watching over me. But then reality hits again and it's a bird. Does anyone actually do that? Talk to themselves? I'll be the first to admit I do. Most the time unintentionally. But it's always better having that one person who would listen to you. I used to have that. I think?
I don't know where lifes going to lead me, but I'm skeptical. I just hope some luck finally hits my way soon. I feel a right pillock telling you this blogspot!
I'm tired, night.
x
Thursday, 24 June 2010
Bloggity Blogs
I actually love blogging. It's pretty k00l.
With it being the last few days of college nothing interesting is really going on with my life. The most thats happened this past week is an on-going battle with a bird. Let me explain;
It's 2am and I'm getting tired. I say bye to all my internet friends, hop into bed (which is a blanket on the floor because beds = bad memories. That's for a different blog) and start to drift away. Untill, bam. I can't sleep, it hits me like a ton of bricks or something. I'm tired, yet I can't sleep. It's been like this for the past 4 days. My sleeping pattern is sloppy. If you know me, you know I'm always up late, whether I have to be up extra early the next morning or whether I'm not required to do anything. I'm a late night guy.
So, the past four days I haven't been getting sleep. Not because of insomnia or even because it's too hot under the covers, which then refers back to my other blog about my feet being snug under the blankee. I can't take the cover off because I'll freak. It's because of a bird.
My mother mentioned yesterday that, "we should keep an eye on the dog, because the birds are sounding insane lately". And it's true. These birds are just squawking at random times in the night. But when I say squawking, I mean SQUAWKING. I've never heard birds so loud.
So last night, I'm ready to fall asleep. And this bird begins. After 5 minutes, I lose my cool and try shoo it away from my window. It fails. I decide to ignore it.
Half hour goes by and a neighbour has gracefully decided to take it upon himself to sort this n00b out. So he's jumping around, flapping his arms tryna make this bird leaves. And it does! YES, peace. Lie down. Bliss.
...
SQUAWK!!
ARGH. It's back with a vengance. It's been like this for the past 4 nights. Considered:
My bands are playing Bridgend Rec tomorrow which should be fun. My throat is killing, but it's the last college gig of the year and last college day too. Now it's summer. I plan on rekindling some old friendships, hanging out with as many people as I can, having fun and falling in love. The last part not so much with a woman. It could be falling in love with a TV show or something.
Outnumbered is number 1 at the moment. The little girl is amazing, in a totally non-peadophile way. If my kid is like her then happy days.
NN
x
With it being the last few days of college nothing interesting is really going on with my life. The most thats happened this past week is an on-going battle with a bird. Let me explain;
It's 2am and I'm getting tired. I say bye to all my internet friends, hop into bed (which is a blanket on the floor because beds = bad memories. That's for a different blog) and start to drift away. Untill, bam. I can't sleep, it hits me like a ton of bricks or something. I'm tired, yet I can't sleep. It's been like this for the past 4 days. My sleeping pattern is sloppy. If you know me, you know I'm always up late, whether I have to be up extra early the next morning or whether I'm not required to do anything. I'm a late night guy.
So, the past four days I haven't been getting sleep. Not because of insomnia or even because it's too hot under the covers, which then refers back to my other blog about my feet being snug under the blankee. I can't take the cover off because I'll freak. It's because of a bird.
My mother mentioned yesterday that, "we should keep an eye on the dog, because the birds are sounding insane lately". And it's true. These birds are just squawking at random times in the night. But when I say squawking, I mean SQUAWKING. I've never heard birds so loud.
So last night, I'm ready to fall asleep. And this bird begins. After 5 minutes, I lose my cool and try shoo it away from my window. It fails. I decide to ignore it.
Half hour goes by and a neighbour has gracefully decided to take it upon himself to sort this n00b out. So he's jumping around, flapping his arms tryna make this bird leaves. And it does! YES, peace. Lie down. Bliss.
...
SQUAWK!!
ARGH. It's back with a vengance. It's been like this for the past 4 nights. Considered:
- BB Gun
- Throwing a bottle of water at it
- Feeding it a scone
- Destroying its nest
- TNT
My bands are playing Bridgend Rec tomorrow which should be fun. My throat is killing, but it's the last college gig of the year and last college day too. Now it's summer. I plan on rekindling some old friendships, hanging out with as many people as I can, having fun and falling in love. The last part not so much with a woman. It could be falling in love with a TV show or something.
Outnumbered is number 1 at the moment. The little girl is amazing, in a totally non-peadophile way. If my kid is like her then happy days.
NN
x
Wednesday, 23 June 2010
This one goes out to all those who died on both Death Stars.
Babysitting is pretty cool. You sit there, watch TV and pretty much relax. It's wicked. I could definetely do this as a job aslong as theres a stockpile of chocolate in the fridge.
When writing these blogs, I don't even know how I begin them. 90% of the time it's random, (like todays) and the stories unfold as I write them. It's quite k00l. You should pretty much all get a blogspot, it's fun. I kinda can't wait till I'm like, 80 and I discover the internet again. Reading these old blogs will remind me of what a rubhead I was. Sorta like embarrsing myself, but in the future or past, iunno.
I haven't watched a thing in the World Cup this year. But I wanted North Korea too win. But after I found out they took a 7 - 0 loss, I've definetely given up hope.
I haven't really done much this last week; with it being the end of college and all. I'm thinking of taking up running/jogging/fast walking to keep myself fit. See, having a car, it's not that I'm fat. But I have put on weight. It kinda sucks. So definetely a thing to do - running. I'll probably do a mile a day and time myself and try and beat it everyday, make it a game. I do this all the time.
For instance, back when I worked in the chip shop, if I ever had to stack cans in the fridge I'd make it a game straight away. Say I'd have 5 crates, I'd open them all up and set the timero n my phone and let loose. Usually I'd beat my time, untill I think I pretty much became a professional can stacker. I think I did a whole crate (24 cans) in like 37 seconds or something. Awesome. Like that episode of Kenan and Kel, where Kel is like a super fast bag boy and bags all the food in like seconds. I wonder if the actor who played Kel actually had to practise that, cause from what I remember it was quick. Double awesome.
A few weeks ago I posted a blog about beards. People laughed at me after I posted it saying, "no way could you grow a beard".
Proof after 2 days of a no shave:
BAM! look at that, a regular santa. Give me 2 more days and I'd look like chewbacca.
So right now it's quiet. Babys asleep. Tv sound won't work. Internet slow. This is the high life. I'm off to try convince Danielle to play I Spy again.
Later homiez
x
When writing these blogs, I don't even know how I begin them. 90% of the time it's random, (like todays) and the stories unfold as I write them. It's quite k00l. You should pretty much all get a blogspot, it's fun. I kinda can't wait till I'm like, 80 and I discover the internet again. Reading these old blogs will remind me of what a rubhead I was. Sorta like embarrsing myself, but in the future or past, iunno.
I haven't watched a thing in the World Cup this year. But I wanted North Korea too win. But after I found out they took a 7 - 0 loss, I've definetely given up hope.
I haven't really done much this last week; with it being the end of college and all. I'm thinking of taking up running/jogging/fast walking to keep myself fit. See, having a car, it's not that I'm fat. But I have put on weight. It kinda sucks. So definetely a thing to do - running. I'll probably do a mile a day and time myself and try and beat it everyday, make it a game. I do this all the time.
For instance, back when I worked in the chip shop, if I ever had to stack cans in the fridge I'd make it a game straight away. Say I'd have 5 crates, I'd open them all up and set the timero n my phone and let loose. Usually I'd beat my time, untill I think I pretty much became a professional can stacker. I think I did a whole crate (24 cans) in like 37 seconds or something. Awesome. Like that episode of Kenan and Kel, where Kel is like a super fast bag boy and bags all the food in like seconds. I wonder if the actor who played Kel actually had to practise that, cause from what I remember it was quick. Double awesome.
A few weeks ago I posted a blog about beards. People laughed at me after I posted it saying, "no way could you grow a beard".
Proof after 2 days of a no shave:
BAM! look at that, a regular santa. Give me 2 more days and I'd look like chewbacca.
So right now it's quiet. Babys asleep. Tv sound won't work. Internet slow. This is the high life. I'm off to try convince Danielle to play I Spy again.
Later homiez
x
Sunday, 20 June 2010
Friends.
Friends, not the tv show, but real life friends.
They're a huge part of everyones life. Some impact you more than others. Some leave foot prints on your heart and some just vanish one day. You've really gotta keep the ones that mean most right beside you. I've lost countless friends, gained aload more but missed those friends I lost more than anything.
I don't want to get really deep into this blog today, but I've realised how much I love certain people. The convosations I can have, the nights I can have, I'm a lucky boy. I live in a town on a big hill, with lots of people. Some nice, some not so nice. It's a matter of rangling the people worth it out and I believe I'm close to knowing whose going to be there for life.
"BUT DEAN, NOONES THERE FOR LIFE". This is bollocks. People have impacted me and I'll always remember them. I don't hate anyone, I can't hate anyone because they've all helped shape me into the guy I am today. Not that I'm totally happy with who I am, I've still got alot of growing up to do. But I'm learning. Each days a lesson and from now on I'm gunna grab it by the balls.
I see theres been no applications too tuck my feet under my blankee at night. Bummer. Ah well, one day.
Today was fathers day. We went for a nice meal down the greenacre. The waitress serving there totally dropped a plate filled with food on me though, the plate even smasked as everyone looked at me. I contemplated faking whiplash and claiming on the nation accident helpline, (you know the one with the woman and that ruler fringe?) I should be rolling in it now. But she was nice and gave me extra food, so thats cool.
Then we went to my aunties, that was pretty fun. Played a little bit of football and it made me realise how much I missed it. Sucks. I used to play for a club and score all the time, Robbie Fowler was my hero.
It's 11:00pm and I'm chatting with a few people. Do people actually read my blogs? Cause I feel I'm writing them more for me than anyone else. It's like a diary just less intrusive. I should start video logging, imagine that. Awesome.
Kick-Ass is on. The girl on it is totally bad ass. Am I the only one who thinks the main guy looks like Cillian Murphy? SPOILERS.
Was anyone else devastated when Big Daddy died? Man, that cut me deep to be honest. Nicholas Cage will always remain awesome.
http://niccageaseveryone.blogspot.com/ - Go there, its amazing. Basically people photoshop Nic's face on everyone, it's fantastic.
Thats about it for tonight. Take care internet.
mexican fist bump
x
They're a huge part of everyones life. Some impact you more than others. Some leave foot prints on your heart and some just vanish one day. You've really gotta keep the ones that mean most right beside you. I've lost countless friends, gained aload more but missed those friends I lost more than anything.
I don't want to get really deep into this blog today, but I've realised how much I love certain people. The convosations I can have, the nights I can have, I'm a lucky boy. I live in a town on a big hill, with lots of people. Some nice, some not so nice. It's a matter of rangling the people worth it out and I believe I'm close to knowing whose going to be there for life.
"BUT DEAN, NOONES THERE FOR LIFE". This is bollocks. People have impacted me and I'll always remember them. I don't hate anyone, I can't hate anyone because they've all helped shape me into the guy I am today. Not that I'm totally happy with who I am, I've still got alot of growing up to do. But I'm learning. Each days a lesson and from now on I'm gunna grab it by the balls.
I see theres been no applications too tuck my feet under my blankee at night. Bummer. Ah well, one day.
Today was fathers day. We went for a nice meal down the greenacre. The waitress serving there totally dropped a plate filled with food on me though, the plate even smasked as everyone looked at me. I contemplated faking whiplash and claiming on the nation accident helpline, (you know the one with the woman and that ruler fringe?) I should be rolling in it now. But she was nice and gave me extra food, so thats cool.
Then we went to my aunties, that was pretty fun. Played a little bit of football and it made me realise how much I missed it. Sucks. I used to play for a club and score all the time, Robbie Fowler was my hero.
It's 11:00pm and I'm chatting with a few people. Do people actually read my blogs? Cause I feel I'm writing them more for me than anyone else. It's like a diary just less intrusive. I should start video logging, imagine that. Awesome.
Kick-Ass is on. The girl on it is totally bad ass. Am I the only one who thinks the main guy looks like Cillian Murphy? SPOILERS.
Was anyone else devastated when Big Daddy died? Man, that cut me deep to be honest. Nicholas Cage will always remain awesome.
http://niccageaseveryone.blogspot.com/ - Go there, its amazing. Basically people photoshop Nic's face on everyone, it's fantastic.
Thats about it for tonight. Take care internet.
mexican fist bump
x
Friday, 18 June 2010
The Art of Tucking.
Someone told me I should start this blog thing again, so they could see what I was doing when I wasn't around. It's kind of a nice thing, whether they read this though is a different story.
I camped last night, what a ball. I was pretty intoxicated and even more euphoric than usual. I'm always happy, or always try to be. I want to put a smile on peoples faces, 95% of the time I fail and cause the exact opposite and people want me gutted, beheaded and shoved on a pike. Henry the 8th style. Atleast I think thats what he did. Oh yeh, I overheard someone say they hoped I was dead last night. What a world we live in where we can just pray death or aids upon someone as if it's a knock knock joke. Knock knock motherfucker, it's aids and he wants in because I said so.
It's 7:42am and I'm tired. So so tired. This has made me realise, while I lie in bed writing to all you amazing readers, yes thats right all 4 of you, that my biggest fear is my bed.
Not falling out of it, or being like assaulted during my sleep. If one day, I do die way to young from an unknown cause, let this be my testimony/eulogy, iunno.
Dear reader,
I have a fear. Not just any fear. A fear I have had since birth which has only exacerbated over time. It's my feet. My feet are my biggest fear.
Not so much the actual feet, but the position they are in. My feet must be perfectly tucked underneath the blanket, not sticking out at all. If I feel so much as a slight draft creep through, I'll reposition untill my feet are snug under my blanket. The fear of something grabbing my feet from the security of my blankee scares the life out of me. My feet MUST be tucked in before I can sleep. It's a must.
So, in life a few things happen. You're born, you go to school, you get a job, you get a partner, you have kids, you have grandkids, you grow old and you die. Sorry to break it to you sweety, but its going to happen. But this whole feet thing has got me worried.
Is my future girlfriend going to be able to put up with this total phobia?! when I'm ill, will she tuck my feet under for me and make sure nothing is gunna tug at my leg? D:
If theres a girl out there that can promise this, apply below. No weirdos.
It's nearly 7:55am, and I could type forever. Oh, my band has a show with Britians got Talent semi-failists Mike Fantastic! Want a ticket? £5.00, please buy one. PLEASE. If I don't sell a required amount then someones taking a bat to my knee caps. Thanks!
So this blog in a nutshell. If my feet stick out the blankee, I freak out.
fist bump
x
I camped last night, what a ball. I was pretty intoxicated and even more euphoric than usual. I'm always happy, or always try to be. I want to put a smile on peoples faces, 95% of the time I fail and cause the exact opposite and people want me gutted, beheaded and shoved on a pike. Henry the 8th style. Atleast I think thats what he did. Oh yeh, I overheard someone say they hoped I was dead last night. What a world we live in where we can just pray death or aids upon someone as if it's a knock knock joke. Knock knock motherfucker, it's aids and he wants in because I said so.
It's 7:42am and I'm tired. So so tired. This has made me realise, while I lie in bed writing to all you amazing readers, yes thats right all 4 of you, that my biggest fear is my bed.
Not falling out of it, or being like assaulted during my sleep. If one day, I do die way to young from an unknown cause, let this be my testimony/eulogy, iunno.
Dear reader,
I have a fear. Not just any fear. A fear I have had since birth which has only exacerbated over time. It's my feet. My feet are my biggest fear.
Not so much the actual feet, but the position they are in. My feet must be perfectly tucked underneath the blanket, not sticking out at all. If I feel so much as a slight draft creep through, I'll reposition untill my feet are snug under my blanket. The fear of something grabbing my feet from the security of my blankee scares the life out of me. My feet MUST be tucked in before I can sleep. It's a must.
So, in life a few things happen. You're born, you go to school, you get a job, you get a partner, you have kids, you have grandkids, you grow old and you die. Sorry to break it to you sweety, but its going to happen. But this whole feet thing has got me worried.
Is my future girlfriend going to be able to put up with this total phobia?! when I'm ill, will she tuck my feet under for me and make sure nothing is gunna tug at my leg? D:
If theres a girl out there that can promise this, apply below. No weirdos.
It's nearly 7:55am, and I could type forever. Oh, my band has a show with Britians got Talent semi-failists Mike Fantastic! Want a ticket? £5.00, please buy one. PLEASE. If I don't sell a required amount then someones taking a bat to my knee caps. Thanks!
So this blog in a nutshell. If my feet stick out the blankee, I freak out.
fist bump
x
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